Essential advice on school entrance

It is cruel to suffer disappointment at that age, but by sitting the exam it does show if the school is right for your kids academically

Grania, web designer and mum to two boys

Grania is mum to two boys (aged 17 and 14), both of whom attend the same independent senior school in Somerset as day pupils. They previously attended the pre-prep and prep attached to the school 

“Over half of the parents I know don’t have a plan B when applying for schools and I’m flabbergasted at this. I wouldn’t dream of resigning from a job without having another job to go to. I’d always be looking at my alternatives.
 
“There are no guarantees that a child going from one school’s pre-prep and prep will get into the senior school. Clearly schools want the money and like continuity and want siblings to be together. However, when your children are aged 10-11 most schools will tell parents if they think that a child may not make it through the entrance exam into the senior school. Take their advice and start looking at other schools.

“People say ‘oh my child will be fine, my child is liked. Even if they perform badly on the day, they’ll take everything into account and all their years in the school’. There are too many instances where that isn’t the case and the parent doesn’t have a plan B.

Clearing scenario

“Then the panic begins. The kids are put into a clearing scenario at a time when they feel particularly vulnerable. They’re going from prep schools of 200 to senior schools of almost 1000 and will feel like a small fish in a big pond. To not know where you’re going is scary. Parents get very angry, kids get very disappointed and it can do lasting damage.

“If your kids don’t get in, as soon as you hear the news get an appointment with the head of the prep and the senior school. If you had not been given any indication that there was a problem there is a case for saying this is cruel, it could have lasting effects on my child and I’d like an explanation. Please reconsider. 

“It’s unlikely that the school wouldn’t have given an indication that there was an issue. If the head said it depended on performance on the day, quickly get round to schools where you think there are places available.

Reluctance to shop around

“There are reasons why people don’t have a plan B – it’s like saying to your boss that you’re looking for another job. I’ve been so pro my children’s school to the point that when I went to see the head and told him we were looking at another school it was like saying ‘I’m going to sleep with someone else’.

“I explained it’s not a reflection of how I feel about the school and that I wasn’t using it as negotiation tactic. He was fantastic about it and said he understood the logic. Wouldn’t he rather have that than a mum who doesn’t have a plan B and then when her child doesn’t get in she thinks he's the biggest b*****d in the world? Some parents decide not to tell the school, but the first choice school will always find out because they’ll be asked for a personal recommendation.

“My boys went to visit the alternative school, met the headmaster, sat the entrance exam, passed and were given places. It cost about £100 to go through that process, which isn’t a great expense when you consider it can cost £100,000 to put a child through private education.

Big morale boost

“Passing both sets of exams gave them a massive morale boost. They didn’t find the exams difficult, not because they’re geniuses but because the school they were at prepared them well and set test exams. There are sleepless nights before the exam, but having a few options does lighten some of the pressure. 

“You can also be crafty and shore up financial benefits by having a plan B. If parents have an incredibly bright child and let the school know that they’re looking elsewhere it almost guarantees a scholarship in the school of choice.
 
“It’s down to league tables. If a child is going to get 12 A*s at GCSE, five As at A-level and is an Oxbridge candidate, the school is going to do what it can to keep them. The parents could be given upwards of 25 per cent off the fees.

Exams help you filter schools

“If a child doesn't get into their favourite school it is cruel to suffer such disappointment, but by sitting the exam it does show if the school is right for your kids academically. I’ve seen kids be groomed with extra tutors to get into the school their parents want them to attend and that school could be tough for them. They could be bottom of the class constantly. It must be very painful and I’d never want that for my children.

“There’s been a lot of dinner party pressure – people saying ‘my child is at a great school and is doing xyz’– and it becomes more about the parents than the kids. That's tragic.”